


redwood

by sweetberri



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Forgiveness, Hurt/Comfort, Loss of Trust, Mention of Animal Death, Mention of sex, Rebuilding, Reconciliation, Relationship Strain, mention of dubcon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-24
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:34:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26086525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetberri/pseuds/sweetberri
Summary: there are wonderful things to see rise from the rubble of a forest fire, if only you give them time.
Relationships: Tendou Satori/Reader
Comments: 4
Kudos: 37





	redwood

The first time he makes you duck your head and want to curl in on yourself is a little over a month before the blowup. You forgot to start the laundry the night before, so you wear a spare skirt from your first year of highschool; it wasn’t even that small on you, just a little short according to school policy. Sharp as a tack, Tendou notices. After last period, as you move to go your separate ways, he flips up your skirt and laughs. **  
**

“Tendou!” you chide in offense, darting your hands down to tuck your skirt under your butt.

“What? I just wanted a peek,” he shoots back in amusement, clearly unphased. Your hands do nothing to deter him from giving your ass one last squeeze before he walks off toward the gym for practice. You throw that skirt in the trash as soon as you get home.

* * *

The first time you second guess what you wear around him is a week before the blowup. Tendou is coming over for a movie night. You’re not in the mood for anything more to happen; you just want to spend some time with your boyfriend.

When he texts you that he’ll be there in five minutes, you’re staring at yourself in the mirror. One of his old t-shirts hangs loosely past the bottom of your comfy pajama shorts; it almost looks like you aren’t wearing any pants. You read his text, then frown, before changing into a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants.

Your favorite blanket stays kicked down at your feet all night; the smoldering embers keep you plenty warm.

* * *

The night of the blowup, you’re hanging out with Tendou and his teammates in the common room of the Shiratorizawa athletic dorm. Ushiwaka had been roped into a round of MarioKart; most of the boys are hooting and hollering as the clueless brute tries (and fails) to maneuver his character through the course in a timely manner. Surprisingly, Tendou isn’t among them.

Instead, he is sat off to the side, away from the commotion. He invites you to sit on his lap when you return from the kitchen area, and you accept without thinking. You also don’t think too hard about the bulge you feel under your ass. Not until the flames lick up your sides.

Tendou’s hands run up your thighs and you shift uncomfortably, trying to ignore it. He misreads this signal.

“Ooh, such a needy little slut. What’s got you all hot and bothered?” he whispers into your neck. Your eyes dart around the room nervously.

“Tendou, not here, please,” you mumble. His advances are becoming more and more aggressive; his words are wandering into territory that borders mean. You draw the line at fingers dipping far below your waistband.

“Tendou, I said _stop!_ ”

You blurt it out so loud, it catches everyone by surprise. The moment gives you a chance to jump to your feet and scramble away, and you run out the door with tears pricking your eyes.

The entire Shiratorizawa VBC stare at you as you go, before 10 pairs of eyes turn and settle on Tendou. The all say the same thing without speaking a word: _‘What the fuck did you do?’_

Tendou immediately regrets everything. Semi once told him some girls were into that whole thing; Tendou thought _you_ were into it. How had he been so sorely mistaken?

* * *

The first time he speaks to you again is two days later. It’s 7:30 in the morning on a Monday, and Tendou had just finished showering after the volleyball team’s usual 6AM workout. He didn’t expect to see you sitting on a bench in one of the school’s courtyards.

You hadn’t anticipated being here either. Your eyes had pried open almost an hour before you usually woke up and refused to shut again. Instead of fighting it, you took the opportunity to run to a local cafe and grab a coffee to take to class. You weren’t used to how short the line was before rush hour, so here you sat, 30 minutes before class, with Tendou standing in front of you. Fate is funny like that, huh?

He murmurs your name like it’s a foreign word—like he shouldn’t be saying it—before asking if he can talk to you. You don’t say anything, but you let him sit; when he sinks down next to you, you scoot over to the opposite end of the bench. With your eyes trained to the ash-laden ground like they are, you don’t see the sadness in his eyes.

Tendou is silent for a bit, but he finally speaks up.

“I fucked up—”

There’s a frog in his throat, and he swallows it down before continuing.

“I fucked up really bad. I never wanted to hurt you, and I’m so sorry that I did.”

As he speaks his mind, you never look up. You don’t say anything, but he’s alright with that. He isn’t asking you to talk to him; he’s just glad you are willing to listen.

Tendou talks for almost 10 minutes. He explains that he thought you were into that kind of play; he admits that he was the one in the wrong for not having an outright conversation about it. He says that he misread your signals, and he wishes he hadn’t been so fast to jump the gun. He knows he broke any of your faith in him; he tells you he wants to gain your trust again. He ensures that he knows it could take a long time; he’s willing to take all the time in the world, if you’re willing to have him.

You sit in silence for a while. Sparing him a glance, there’s a sincerity in his eyes that makes you blink in surprise.

“Would you,” he asks slowly, like a newborn foal on shaky legs; unsure of what’s to come, but aware that nothing good will come without trying. “Maybe come sit by me at lunch?”

You can say no if you want, but as you tuck a hair behind your ear, you nod instead.

* * *

Lunch is awkward. You’re much quieter than you ever used to be around Tendou. He is the kind of person that brings out a fun-loving, often rowdy side in everyone; you didn’t used to be an exception. Today is different though.

When you sit down next to Tendou, his teammates observe the ruins wordlessly. As everyone eats, it’s clear that the air between you two is different, but no one points it out for fear of making it any more uncomfortable than it already is.

Except for Ushijima. Halfway through lunch, he says out of the blue, “You haven’t said anything this whole time, y/n. It’s odd.”

You can’t resist the laugh that bubbles through your lips. The brute’s struggle with social cues usually led to things becoming _more_ awkward, but today it is the knife that cuts through tension and relieves some of the weight on your shoulders. You appreciate him, regardless of the intention behind his words.

* * *

You and Tendou never directly discuss the status of your relationship after the blowup. It certainly felt like an unspoken break up, but at the same time, with this chance you’ve given him, everything is just muddled.

He goes out of his way to see you. If there’s a big homework assignment due soon, he’ll ask if you need any help on it. If he is out and about, he asks if you want any snacks from the gas station. He slips his weekly ShonenJump magazine under your door as soon as he finishes it. You sit with him at lunch every day, and he always excitedly offers you the best bite from his meal.

A collection of pine cones is beginning to gather on your nightstand.

* * *

The first time he touches you again is a month or so after the big blowup. He is stopping by to drop off a notebook you had let him borrow because he missed class due to a volleyball game. As soon as he opens the door to your dorm room, you sit up straighter and wipe your eyes frantically, but there’s no hiding the way you had been sobbing; the way you _are_ sobbing.

You’re halfway laying back against your pillows, knees bent up with your feet tucked up by your butt. Tendou forgets about the notebook he came to drop off; he slides over and sits on the edge of your bed, asking what’s wrong with a sweet coo in his voice.

You tell him that your mom called and told you the family dog died. Tendou had only interacted with him a couple times since Shiratorizawa students live on campus, but he knows you loved that animal with your whole heart. It slept at the foot of your bed whenever you were home; it trailed after you expectantly whenever feeding time was approaching; it curled at your feet for ‘protection’ whenever your parents would scold it.

“I just wish I could have been there to say goodbye,” your voice quivers. Your parents have already sent it off to be cremated; there was no spare freezer space at home to preserve it for any amount of time. You would have spent a little more time with the dog last time you were home if you had known you wouldn’t see him again.

The realization sends fresh tears down your face, and when you try to inhale, your breath hitches violently.

Tendou hurts when he sees you hurt. He wants nothing more than to give you even an iota of comfort, so he reaches out to you. You cower away from his hand without even realizing it; even a month later, he made you nervous.

His heart cracks, little splinters lodging in his throat which tightens painfully. He knows that reaction is his fault, and part of him wants to snatch his hand back ashamedly, but he chooses to remain steady with his action. After a moment, he pulls you into a hug.

Your body freezes; there’s a moment of resistance, because the last thing you’ve associated with his touch is that wall of flames, but eventually you relax. Accepting the gesture graciously, you slip your arms around his ribcage and bury your face in his chest.

* * *

The first time he kisses you again is three weeks after that. Granted, it isn’t a _real_ kiss; after a late night group study session at a local boba shop with some classmates, Tendou offered to walk you to your dorm, and as you hug him goodnight and say thank you, he presses a chaste kiss to the top of your head.

He doesn’t even realize that he did it until after you let go; the gesture just felt so natural. It’s unclear to him whether or not you noticed the sapling.

“Text me when you get back to your dorm so I know you made it safe,” you remind him as you walk to your door.

“Will do,” he promises and turns to walk away.

As you close the door behind you, a tiny smile graces your face and you place a hand atop your head.

* * *

The first time he _actually_ kisses you again is another month after that. The Shiratorizawa mens’ volleyball team had just won an important game for playoffs. After the post-game ceremony, players and spectators alike milled about the court in celebration, chatting before gym staff would shoo them all away.

Tendou spies you out of the corner of his eye, standing out of the way by the doors that led back to the locker room. He ditches his teammates without a second thought and makes his way over to you.

It’s a tad quieter over here; he can lower his voice to speak to you easily.

“You came!”

He sounds a bit surprised, and you cock your head.

“Of course!” you chuckle, “I said I would, didn’t I?”

There’s a pregnant pause, and Tendou rubs the back of his neck and drops his eyes to the floor. He has an almost embarrassed smile on his face.

“I’ll be honest, I really want to kiss you right now.”

He can’t see it because he’s still averting his gaze, but you smile, the flesh of your cheeks becoming feverish, before grabbing the front of his shirt and standing on your tiptoes to kiss him gently.

* * *

The first time you two have sex again is almost four months after that. You have to be the one to initiate it; Tendou never wants to misread a signal or get ahead of himself again.

You’re hanging out in his room; both of you had taken a nap together earlier. You’re hair is mussed up, you’re in an ugly old t-shirt with a still-wet drool spot on it, and you’re sitting on the edge of his bed, looking in the shitty mirror hanging from his closet door as you rub the last remaining grogginess from your eyes.

“Do you still think I’m pretty?”

The question catches him totally off guard, so he sits up straight against the pillows and tosses his phone down.

“Of course I do, baby,” he tells you without hesitation before smiling. “You don’t think I call you ‘pretty girl’ for no reason, do you?”

An amused grin flashes over your face, but it’s gone as soon as it forms; it was the closest Tendou will receive to a laugh at the moment. You’re too busy with your thoughts.

The pause that follows is long, and Tendou is about to say something else when you cut him off.

“Can you… show me?”

You aren’t looking at him; instead, you’ve got your eyes on your hands which are twiddling nervously. Tendou’s brows furrow briefly, and then he realizes what exactly you mean. The bed dips behind you as he scoots off the mattress and comes to kneel in front of you. His position forces you to look at him with his head cocked and eyebrows raised expectantly.

“You sure you’re okay with that?”

When you meet his gaze and nod, his eyes shine brightly and he gives a gentle squeeze to the flesh above your knee before leaning forward and kissing you.

As cheesy and gross as it sounds, Tendou really does ‘make love’ to you; it’s soft and tender and slow. Meeting his gaze, bodies melding together like the roots of an aspen grove, you did not see the same man that held you seven months ago. He’d grown into something far more whole and steadfast.

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

There is something far more breathtaking about seeing life return to the forest, than arriving when it was already green.


End file.
